It's amazing where dropping a little weight will put you on the "hot girl" radar. Last night, after the show, I was approached by several girls, some I've known for years and some were strangers, and the little flirty conversations began. A rock-stars dream, right?
I've not only always been a fat-kid at heart, but I've literally been a fat-kid most of my life. There was a two year period where I was totally fit and wore girl jeans straight out of High School. The same phenomenon happened then too. All the girls that wouldn't even look at me in school were suddenly wanting to go out on dates. Back then, I never took the opportunities because although I had a great body, I still had terrible self-esteem. Now, I'm not taking the opportunities because I don't give a fuck. Fuck them for being so shallow. I talked to them for 2 minutes and was bored out of my mind. Have something to say, bring something to the table, have a brain worth picking at, have an interesting hobby, sit me down, shut me up, and tell me ten things I don't already know. Your looks aren't enough for me.
I know that I'm coming off as the bitter guy that just never got any in High School, but I swear that's not the case. I just don't want to waste my time. I don't want to be the guy pushing 30 in 6 years, trying to keep the band alive, trying to get girls with freshly pierced nose rings to come home with me, drinking my fucking liver and kidneys away. Life is too short for being coy, for acting foolish, for doing drugs, for mind games, for hate.
I am willing and I am going to leave all this behind anyway. I can only hope to God that people are in fact different elsewhere. When I get out of this state, I'll integrate into a part of society that better suits me instead of dominating a part of society that is below me. Call me cocky, but that is how I see it.
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